These are much more fun than your first drafts! I'm glad. Definite improvement over the design, too. I really dig the old man's wrinkly features. Maybe this is a personal thing, but I think his legs (as an old man, the kid's fine) should be a little longer. I know it's foreshortened, but I had trouble connecting his lower half to the torso (which is done really well. I like his busted tooth). Another personal opinion: I think his beard should be even longer. Remember how ridiculous his hair was when he was a teenager? Yeah. I'm sure it'll be clarified with shadow/light/some linework, just some things look confusing right now.
In the younger picture, maybe busting the wood up a bit would make it look more precarious. Also.... Both characters are facing the same way. It may not seem like a big deal, but since we're taught to read left to the right, and both of them are directed to the right, people may leave the page prematurely. You could reverse one or just ignore it, heh. Try it out, though.
Oh, but the format is great, because you could put them alongside the first piece you did, one on each side, it'd be a triptych! Just a thought. But really, these are awesome, I can't wait to see them finished!
their expressions are amazing. I def think they are some of your best pieces ever!
A lot of what julia said is pretty spot on and im sure. If i changed anything glaring, it would be the sky in the first one. itsa little stark, and maybe some simple lines or something of the sort just to break up the weight of the top part of the image would really help. (hopefully thats simple enough :3 )
I think your shapes and designs over all are getting really good.
I most certainly don't have all the time in the world left to work on these, but I would appreciate any feedback one might offer.
2 comments:
These are much more fun than your first drafts! I'm glad. Definite improvement over the design, too. I really dig the old man's wrinkly features. Maybe this is a personal thing, but I think his legs (as an old man, the kid's fine) should be a little longer. I know it's foreshortened, but I had trouble connecting his lower half to the torso (which is done really well. I like his busted tooth). Another personal opinion: I think his beard should be even longer. Remember how ridiculous his hair was when he was a teenager? Yeah. I'm sure it'll be clarified with shadow/light/some linework, just some things look confusing right now.
In the younger picture, maybe busting the wood up a bit would make it look more precarious. Also.... Both characters are facing the same way. It may not seem like a big deal, but since we're taught to read left to the right, and both of them are directed to the right, people may leave the page prematurely. You could reverse one or just ignore it, heh. Try it out, though.
Oh, but the format is great, because you could put them alongside the first piece you did, one on each side, it'd be a triptych! Just a thought. But really, these are awesome, I can't wait to see them finished!
DAH SO CUTE!
their expressions are amazing. I def think they are some of your best pieces ever!
A lot of what julia said is pretty spot on and im sure. If i changed anything glaring, it would be the sky in the first one. itsa little stark, and maybe some simple lines or something of the sort just to break up the weight of the top part of the image would really help. (hopefully thats simple enough :3 )
I think your shapes and designs over all are getting really good.
also, that is one happy shark lol
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